Subject: trans 5-year-old
Audience: family friends who almost certainly would NOT be accepting
Hey FRIEND,
I want to let you know that sometime soon it will be more public knowledge that CHILD is transgender. I figured I should give you a heads up because I’m aware that that’s not something FRIEND’S SPOUSE believes in. I don’t know where you stand on the topic.
I can assure you that we are completely certain that affirming CHILD’s gender is the best thing for PRONOUN and that we’re doing so in consultation with experts in the field. It is in PRONOUN best interests that we surround PRONOUN with people who also affirm PRONOUN. Studies show that doing so decreases the suicide rate in transgender children monumentally, which is obviously of the utmost importance.
I think I know where FRIEND’S SPOUSE stands on this. PRONOUN mentioned to me over the summer that one of the reasons PRONOUN dislikes public school is that they have the agenda of telling kids that they can choose their gender. I can only say to that that CHILD didn’t choose this. There is science that shows that the brains of transgender AFFIRMED GENDERs like CHILD match the brains of other AFFIRMED GENDERS rather than the brains of ASSIGNED GENDERS. It’s not a choice, but it is a reality.
I hope this doesn’t drive a wedge between us. I hope we can continue to be friends. I hope our kids can continue to be close. But if you feel as a family that affirming CHILD in PRONOUN AFFIRMED GENDER gender is not something you’re comfortable doing, that would be a problem. If that is the case I suppose we’ll have to agree to disagree and each raise our children in the way we see fit.
I hope you had a very Merry Christmas and that 2020 is treating you well. ️
Trans Parenting: Letters to the World 